Sterling Institute of Relationship - Wikipedia
However, critics of Justin Sterling have told CultNews that this self-styled relationship guru has done more harm than good and is something of. I did some research and found that Justin Sterling and his Sterling Institute of Relationship were included on web pages that warned of cults. Archived information about Sterling Institute of Relationship founded by Justin Sterling, Arthur ''Artie'' Kasarjian.
This includes a confidentiality agreement and waivers for physical, emotional and mental injuries without limitation including adverse effects that the Weekend may have on your current therapy.
Besides signing your life away, you will be giving permission for videotaping and audiotaping your activities and allowing Sterling to use these "in any way they deem appropriate".
Of course you will be told that you cannot photograph, audiotape or even take notes! Like other cults, all these people are volunteers. The Weekend is designed to wear you down through sleep deprivation and lack of regular meal breaks. Besides being hungry and tired you will lose your sense of personal control by being told you can't use the washroom except on announced 15 minute breaks. The men are given garbage cans to pee in at the corners of the room.
Bodyguards are posted at all doors and to add to the intimidation they have walkie-talkies or headsets on. Production Team members usually of the opposite sex to you are stationed around the room videotaping.
Sterling Weekend Awakening
To add to the humiliation process women are called "jerks" and during the Men's Weekend, men are asked to walk around the room for 15 minutes yelling over and over again the phrase "When it comes to relationships, I'm a fucking jerk". The rules are presented by Sterling's assistant and include: No speaking, can't leave the room except during break time, listening carefully, etc You will also be told that "the Weekend is ended when Justin says so and not before".
Neither questions, nor time is allowed for any personal reflection on the information being given. You are either chastised or physically punished push-ups for being late from the short 15 minute breaks which are given. All these techniques are used to put your critical thinking on hold.
Participants must bring a special dish to serve people, "A dish prepared for royalty". After the meal, the dishes are critiqued and participants praised or criticized. According to Justin, the effort one takes to prepare this dish reflects on how the person runs their life. You will be subjected to long periods of boring, monotonous material with definitions, which are repeated several times.
Chanting exercises are also incorporated into the program. This, in combination with sleep deprivation and the authoritarian conditions, sets up the audience to be in a suggestible state ready for hypnotic manipulation and mind control. After the initial definitions and purpose of the weekend is given by an assistant, your group will be left for about 3 hours to do nothing except get frustrated waiting for "his highness" Justin Sterling. Justin eventually speaks over the loud speakers and says how he has been watching and lectures for 20 minutes then dismisses everyone for a 15 minute break.
Justin then arrives "in the flesh" for a lengthy question and answer period about relationships. However, if a question is asked about his qualifications or it appears that he does not have an answer, He belittles the person asking the questions and avoids giving an answer. For men he often makes the questioner do push-ups. Usually a supper break occurs at this point followed by more definitions, rules, etc.
Sunday, when an exercise about venting anger is conducted. You are asked to pair up and to shout at each other making your partner the recipient of your anger. After this intense emotional outburst everyone is drained and sent out for sleep with an order to take a 3 minute cold shower in the morning. After a few hours, later on Sunday morning, the windows of the room are blackened out and meditation exercises are conducted.
Letter From a Sterling Institute Ex-Friend | Millicent and Carla Fran
If the feeling gets too intense, close your eyes and continue when you feel ready". People are asked to share stories of grief to the whole room video cameras are rolling as usual. You will be told to comfort those who are in pain and to feel each other's anguish if you have none of your own.
People will be hugging and crying. This is followed by group dancing. More definitions and rules are repeated again by an assistant. Justin arrives to announce that "This is the sex part of the Weekend".
People are expected to share personal sexual experiences in graphic detail.
This Is usually followed by dinner around 9 p. For the women there is a graduation ceremony with candle holding. The Men's Weekend has a particularly abusive psychological mind game consisting of having all the men in stand in a circle around the room. Justin states that they should imagine that they are all warriors going to war and that he has given everyone the tools over the Weekend to do this.
Anyway, when I arrived at 8: The "volunteers" were all very catatonic-like and repeated directions only. I had to print my name again as it was not up to their standards. Then we were ushered into this dimly lit auditorium. The windows were all covered. In that room there were just women. They told us the rules of the weekend.
Don't talk, you can't go to the bathroom until breaks, etc. Basically--don't do anything unless you are told to. Then we all about of us sat there without talking for about 40 minutes before the crowd got anxious and started rebelling.
Meanwhile, the whole thing was being video taped. The men stormed the stage and took over the room. There was no resistance from the women. Eventually, it got hostile toward the women and they were asked to leave.Janice Nisker from The Sterling Institute with Janette Burke
They finally left a few hours later. After a few hours of this revolt, men getting up on the stage pouring their hearts out and spilling their guts--the room went dark and a voice came in over the loudspeakers.
It was like the wizard of Oz. He spoke for a while and then the man behind the voice appeared and starting lecturing us--it was Justin Sterling. Justin Sterling's Message Society was screwed up because women have become masculine and competitive and men have become feminized. We are going against thousands of years of genetic programming--men are the hunters, women are the gatherers.
He talked about the cost of being in relationships, divorce, etc. Some Rules about Two kinds of relationships: You should get out of a STR relationship at the first sign of trouble, but with the following exceptions-- "If she gives good head" "If she swallows" "If she takes it up the ass". Men don't have any emotional needs that can't be gotten from a dog Men should never discuss feelings with women Men should never do anything with women that they do with men in a competitive sense like play golf, tennis, etc.
Women marry for power and resources, not love. Men marry for love.
Men should not compromise themselves at all in a relationship. How much you are devastated by the end of a relationship with women is a function of how much you compromised your masculinity. Men should focus on success and only that. Men think they are good at relationships--but aren't and shouldn't try to be.
Women are problem concentric: They need to have problems so don't try and help them solve them because they will just find another problem to bitch about. Problems to women are status. The highest status problems lately are sexual harassment, abuse, etc.
This lecturing went on for hours. We started at 8: We couldn't leave the room during the lecturing unless you had to go "number two".
Sterling Institute of Relationship
Men were told to urinate in garbage cans, which they did. It was all very intimidating--the women left before the lecturing began. It was all men--some looked like bouncers in uniforms, with headsets and walkie-talkies. The women who were there earlier, were there to prove a point.